June 14th 2018

On the day you were born

Butterflies all around
Along with your kicks and rolls;
Mama hugged her round belly
Terrified but absolutely excited-
It wouldn't be long until we met
Daddy all gowned up and ready;
With his nerves shot-
But he held on strong for Mama
We walked into the room;
That you would soon be here
Mama cried on table-
While Daddy held on and soothed
The doctors draped up;
And soon had mama rocking
Within seconds...
Here you were!
The biggest and sweetest cry;
That we ever heard
Daddy and Mama instantly cried
They whisked you away-
To check you out
Perfect; you were,
They brought you back to us
We both fell in love with you-
And with each other even more
You amazed us in every way;
Tiniest little babe in Mama's arms
Wrapped your finger around Daddy's
With you; our family grew bigger
You are forever our baby-
We love you for always
On the day you were born.


June 14th 2018
5lbs 11 oz
17 3/4" long
Benjamin Jason James Innes

Manic Mode

 Irrational-

All these thoughts consume me

Overreacting;

I let my insecurities best me

High and low;

No middle ground-

I'm stuck in stasis

My chest constricts 

And my mind screams out loud;

Silence echoes round the room

My emotions shut down,

My face: unreadable 

Until the dam breaks-

One by one the tears roll down

My heart heavy;

And I'm shattered all over again

Your eyes alone-

Brings me back to reality

I'm easily lost amongst your kisses

All these dreams and all these fears

Wash away when I feel you near;

My heartbeat quickens

And my thoughts calm the waters

My face radiates a smile from ear-to-ear

Manic Mode.

Justin

I fell for your thoughts,
And the way you said my name-
You make me feel amazing

I want to be inside your mind,
To hear every thought and desire-
All your fears and all your dreams

I want you,
To see the way you look at me-
And to feel the way I feel about you

My favorite moment with you,
Just lying still in bed-
Running my fingers along your back

I love the way you smile,
That silly smirk-
And the way I drive you crazy

I'm falling hard,
I want you-
Always.

Yours for the taking

I've been walking around; stumbling 
With my head in the clouds
For the longest time I've been crumbling,
And then there you were; 
Standing out in the crowds
All it took was one smile-
Before I began to fall
Made everything else worthwhile
You can be my wrecking ball;
Break me over and over
Tear down all the walls
You've won me over-
Baby, you can have it all;
You can have my heart and my body
But best of all you can have my mind-
I'm all yours for the taking.

Darkest Day

My darkest day has come and past;
Pain will not continue to last
One by one the tears roll down;
Fighting constantly not to drown
Voices in my head persist to scream;
High or low- always extreme
I'm walking amongst a living hell;
Always being told not to dwell
But I'm fighting an internal battle;
It's more than I can handle
Upon my heart, there's all these scars;
All my dreams and all my fears
I have no idea where to begin;
Will this ever be a fight that I'll win?

Identity

Completely trapped-
Boiling inside
Agony, bloodcurdling screams
Shredded -
Endless knots;  unable to come apart
Pounding throughout my veins
Tearing my skin-
Anger,  disgust and hatred grip my thoughts
Wretching- my heart
Incapable of release;  save me!
Voices scream- no escape
Vines wrap my body,
Taking me for their own
Stripped-of my identity
Changes;  endlessly
Obstacles never overcome
No voice of reason
Just me, myself and I-
... an eternal battle

Belle

My pretty girl,
You've waked many a mile alongside me
Caught all the tears I shed;
Purred to let me know you were content
Your paw print is imprinted upon my heart
Special is what you are,
I'll never forget your scent;
The touch of your fur
Or the way you'd nudge your head
You've taken a piece of my heart-
Wherever you've gone,
Run wild and free
I still feel your soul;
For it's inside my heart.

I love you Belley-Boo ♡

12-05-14