Don't give up on me

Sliding-
Straight into a world dividing
Holding on; my grip slips
Pummeling and my body tips
People screaming, I'm numb
This isn't my time to come
Dark, silent, crimson
This can't be my extinction?
Little voices, louder
My head's the doubter
Whereas my heart continues to beat-
I'm not allowing such an easy defeat
Concrete, salty, soaked
Where am I?
My arms drenched, bloodied
Confusion- my mind muddied
My body aches, I'm screaming inside
All they could say was they "tried"
I'm a fighter!
My heart feels lighter
BEEP-BEEP-BEEP
"LOOK!!"

Don't ever give up on me.



*Side note: I get nightmares where I'm in a car accident. A lot of the time, I'm the one driving. My dreams usually never end this far, but to my loved ones, if this ever happens... I promise I'll always fight my hardest to come back. I love you. Especially Angie, you're the love of my life...

Never Releasing

Million miles apart
Thoughts weigh heavy upon the heart
Irregular rhythm to note the distance
There's only one existence
Never changing and going forward; always a step behind
Reaching to where we will be; "Once upon a time(d)"
Struggling to resist to cease
Every thought of you, my heart rate increase
Fingers; never touching
However, you, in my fingers tightly clutching
Never releasing-
Afraid to continue ceasing
You're mine and I, yours
Secret Keepers in its' entirety.

Winter Wonderland

Snow on the ground,she picks up her dress
Corsage on her wrist;
Flowers in the curliness of her hair
Natasha sways in each step;
Her hand in mine
A perfect match
Snowflakes hang in the air
Music flow as we spin round and round
Her dress turquoise as her birthstone
Beautiful revenge;
Against Phillip and his new buck-teethed girl
Her smile so big, it's contagious
Her task is complete;
All I want to do is spin her the night away.


*Side note: A while ago, Brad asked me to do a poem with the name of Natasha and Phillip and their relationship conflict; this is what I came up with. Me being the third point of view of a guy who just wanted to make her happy. (This is what I hope is the way most guys think toward women!) But anyways, I thought it was amazing and decided to add it here.

Secret

Luscious lips
Bleeding crimson
Vengeful kisses stolen
Lips sought the nape of her neck
Sweet perspiration salty upon the tongue
Moans escape her throat
Proving her loss of self-control
Silent tears roll down her cheeks
Hand-in-hand,
Bound of secrets not meant to keep-
Always left wanting,
Needing more
But the secret has her bound-
As every lips has a secret kiss.

*Side note: This is just a random poem I got after reading the "city of Bones" series. The love Jace and Clary have for each other was really empowering to read about. If you haven't read it- GO! Get the book, it's seriously amazing to read.

Petals in the wind

Two roses of love-
With thorns of flaws

One of blood red-
Red for passionate

One of white-
White for purity

Two intertwining-
Interlocking a bond of trust

Two differences-
Together form strength

One petal from each-
Both a single promise

You & me.

One

One more hour-
I'm almost out
One more day-
It's creeping up fast
One more week-
Just another memory
One more month-
What's another?
One more year-
How much longer?
One more decade-
No chance of turning back the clock
Just one more eternity-
It's all over.


*Side note: I was at work and was thinking A LOT. At first it started out about work, but in the end it became about life. Work is my life I suppose...

Battles Within

I'm not as innocent as I look
People seem to think I'm readable as a book;
As if they know what I'm thinking.

If I'm sad, it's never for the reason they think they know;
Angry but I keep it all inside.

I know the outcome of my depression;
I'm the only one the blame.

Am I as fragile as I seem?
I'm not that easy to break;
If only they knew what I held every day.

A battle introverted and extroverted;
I'm fighting both sides that I'm losing.

I come with shards of glass-
No one will ever be able to piece them together again;
They know what I want them to know.

Incapable of knocking walls down-
I've barricaded myself;
If I'm screaming- they'll never know.

They'll never know who I am completely;
Because I'll never be able to save myself.


*Side note: This was back when I first finally got my anti-depressants. I had really, really needed them and still do. They help- A LOT but it's still hard. Every one still tend to think I'm breakable. I'm a lot stronger and getting there every day. The first step is admitting you have a problem with something and it's not something that's easily fixable. I have a lot of issues with myself and with my past. Deafness is still currently one but one I wish to resolve happily and peacefully because I really do need to come to terms with it and just accept that it's a part of me which is very difficult to do because I'm still angry about it. I do wish I could hear a lot more, but I have benefited a bit from being deaf. I know sign language, I can read lips, I know how to talk and I can hear quite a bit with the assistance of my Cochlear Implant which is a lot more than a lot of deaf people can say. It's sad to know they've never heard music but it's not like they can't communicate. Communicating with your hands is beautiful. I love signing, I miss it but I'm really shy to do it publicly without another deaf person to confer with. I do tend to talk out loud as I sign, but it's easier for me when it's with another deaf person because they NEED me to sign.