Perfect Disguise. December 17th, 2009

I think she knows
She's not a stupid girl,
I'm sure she sees the way my face falls
Every single time I hear her name
Or when she walks past without a glance
Without a chance-
I think she knows,
How can she not?
I close my eyes and wish with all my might
That I won't forget
I wish you'd put up more of a fight
I paint the perfect mask of complexion,
My eyes are smiling while I'm screaming inside
I could never handle the rejection
Mind apart and souls divide
I think she knows
When I turn to say I'll be alright
I keep my voice steady but my body says something else
I'll shake and she'll try to hold me tight
But I'll do what I always do- push her away
I think she knows
I can't handle this anymore
Every word out of my mouth is trite
Why am I the one she chose to ignore?
I'll take a breather- just for tonight
I think she knows
She knows-
I'll break myself before I'll break her heart
Drinking just to forget
I just can't tear myself apart
I won't do anything I'll regret
I think she knows
She definitely knows-
I'm falling apart one by one
My mask of disguise crumbling away
I've already begun to coming undone
Everything's out for me to portray
I think she knows
That I miss you.